Improved Health in Marriage
by Youmasu J. Siewe, Ph.D, MPH.

According to the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’s national center for health statistics, married adults are healthier than divorced, widowed or never married adults, based on a recent interview of 127,545 adults.  

            According to this report, about 58% of US adults are married, 10.4% are separated or divorced, 6.6% are widowed, 19% never been married, and 5.7% are living with a partner. Among their findings were:

            1) Married adults are more likely than unmarried adults to be in better health, and less likely to suffer from headaches and serious emotional or psychological problems and live longer. 2) Married adults are more likely to be productive at work and other activities of daily living than unmarried adults. 3) Married adults are less likely to smoke, drink heavily or be physically inactive. However, married men are more likely to be overweight or obese than unmarried men. 4) Adults who live together but not married (cohabiting) are more likely to have health problems than married adults.

            Marriage which is the foundation of the family and proven to have health benefits has been going through a crisis with high divorce rate, more people living together and postponing marriage, some determining never to be married, while those longing for a happy lifetime of happiness in marriage may have good reasons to be nervous about marriage. 

            What makes some couples to stay married?  Well, there is no magic pill or formula to find and keep Mr. or Mrs. Right, but the following ideas may improve the health of your marriage.

Before marriage: a) Find someone with more similar than dissimilar characteristics or backgrounds, b) take time to get to know one another than rush in marriage; a quick beginning is more likely to come to a quicker ending; c) Avoid the temptation of cohabiting or living for many years without marriage; prolonged living together without marriage increases the likelihood of divorce after marriage.

During Marriage:  a) Unconditionally respect your spouse for what and who  they are and not for what you expect or want them to be; b) Maintain an open line of communication and learn to negotiate on troubling issues. c) Learn to listen to your spouse, and be willing to change for the good of the relationship. d) Accept responsibilities for individual and as well as dual roles accepted by your cultural and your own relationship; e) Be willing to change or adapt and never enter a marriage relationship thinking that things will remain the way they were before marriage, or as you want them to be. f) Learn to appreciate one another by letting your spouse know he/she is special no matter what changes may take place in their lives - whether sickness or health, income loss or gain, weight gain or loss, and others.  g) Find some common interests, but be prepared to create your own happiness if necessary, while respecting that of your spouse.

            The above factors do not guarantee successful marriage, because several factors can pull spouses together or away from each other.  However, by respecting, being willing to communicate, negotiate and pull together when things get tough, couples can remain happily married and improve their health.

Youmasu J. Siewe, Ph.D., MPH, is State Specialist for Health/Family Development, Oklahoma Cooperative Extension Service at OSU in Stillwater.  For Questions, call (405) 744 6825.  For online access to Extension/Community Health Column, please check “articles” on the web at: http://www.fcs.okstate.edu/health/.